I can’t believe I am more than 10 weeks into my treatment, with less than two weeks to go. Although I have never felt unwell because of hep C, I realise I have been living under a cloud of shame and regret for years. In the past 12 months particularly, I have been “stuck”, unable to move forward, waiting for my treatment to commence. I have definitely been hiding my light under a bushel. Now that the treatment is working and I am undetectable, I am starting to get my mojo back.
I am feeling inspired to cast off the shackles of the past, reorganise my book case, and my life. To get my house in order and project who I really am. Already I am getting feedback from strangers and colleagues that I am “glowing”. I checked the mirror and the same old 50-something year old is looking back at me, so clearly I must be projecting something different, something more positive.
I love chatting with my peers and seeing the resilience and determination of people to get cured so I interact with a lot of people with hep C in online forums. But I am often overwhelmed with the amount of negativity, directed at the health system, the government, the medical profession, the drug companies and even at me. I am not naïve to the agenda of these stakeholders and I do get peoples frustration, but I prefer to look for the positives, and there are plenty. Despite the fact that we are still waiting for access to Direct Acting Antivirals in Australia; despite the fact that there are enormous hurdles to overcome to get everyone with hep C cured; I feel really positive that we are on the cusp of a revolution in hep C treatment.
I wonder if some of the negativity comes from the shame and regret that others like me have lived with, or the frustration of feeling “stuck” waiting for treatment?
The views expressed above are mine alone and not necessarily those of my employer.
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